Killing Laban (1 Nephi 3-4)

Have you ever had to ‘kill Laban’?

Don’t answer too quickly. Stop and think for a minute.

Have you ever had to do something that was so foreign to your basic nature that it took the absolute certainty that comes from knowing it is something God wants you to do to give you the courage to do it?

I bet you have.

Have you ever felt the Spirit tell you to do something, and said in your heart, “I can’t do this! This is too hard. This is not me. This is outside my world view. This goes against some of my most basic core beliefs and feelings.”? Have you looked at a task, knowing God wanted you to do it, and yet also knowing that your own desires, your own dreams, your own motivations were not enough to make you do it? That nothing on this earth was strong enough to make you do it, to carry through with it?

I bet you’ve felt that too.

I’ve felt it. I’ve been there in that moment, asked to kill Laban and not having the strength. I’ve been there more than once, and I bet you have too.

These moments, these events, are too personal to share with others, but you know what they are. And you know, like I do, what it feels like to stand there, sword in hand, facing the struggle to obey God or to obey the inclinations of self. It is never an easy decision.

And it usually comes upon the heels of a long trek back to Jerusalem, leaving you exhausted, trembling and uncertain.

Killing Laban is always hard.

And yet, I know I must choose. I either know the voice of the Lord in my heart and mind, or I don’t. I either obey God, or I don’t. I either believe, or I don’t.

There is no middle ground when you’re faced with killing Laban. You either do it, or you don’t.

And so, I made my choice. I killed Laban today. I picked up the sword of faith and lopped off the head of fear.