Squeezing Out the Infection

March 13, 2006

The Lord seems to teach me in circular lessons. If I don’t learn it the first time, I don’t need to worry. He’ll set things up to give me another chance. And another. And another. Until I finally get the lesson.

This isn’t an easy process. When I don’t learn the lesson, it leaves a wound. If the wound doesn’t heal, it festers. When the lesson comes around again, it’s a chance to resolve the issues, to learn the lesson and to heal. And part of me is really grateful for this opportunity.

Another part of me is petrified. It’s one thing to understand that it’s time to rip the scab off, let the infection drain and think, “Oh good, an opportunity to clean the wound and finally let it heal.” It’s another thing entirely to actually do it.

My daughter had an infected belly button a few weeks ago. It needed to be tended. She had to put a hot wet cloth over it for a few minutes, then squeeze out the infection—three times a day. That was the only way to get the wound clean, to get the infection and the pus out and allow it to heal. She said the squeezing hurt so bad she almost passed out. She couldn’t do it herself. She had to have someone do the squeezing for her.

So here I am. Facing another go at the lesson. I have to get that infection out somehow, but I don’t have the strength or the courage or the ability to squeeze it myself. I don’t even know how. So please, Lord, I’ll stand still and let you squeeze.